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Has Arsene got a book out?

OSLEY: I would take Wenger the carefree cowboy over Nicklas Bendtner's tales of doing the deed...

15 October, 2020 — By Richard Osley

Arsene Wenger continues his never-ending book promotion tour

DURING his time as Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger often seemed cautious.

When it came to transfers, it could seem like he was working out each fee to the nearest penny.

Sometimes you wanted him to get angrier with underperforming players. And sometimes you just wanted him to play the madcap hammerfoot Lucas Poldolski more.

But look at this brand new carefree cowboy in town. Wenger, this week, drew a packed crowd to the London Palladium for the latest round in his never-ending book promotion tour.

To think, Manhattan Lights has yet to reopen, but this place was rammed. In fact, photos from inside the seemingly sold-out theatre would make you forget all about pandemics.

• ARSENAL’S website this week includes the headlines “Welcome To The Partey”, “Let’s Get This Partey Started” and “No Thomas, No Partey”.

You can’t blame them for pushing the shirt sales and there seems to be great excitement about his arrival from Atletico Madrid.

But at what point does the Partey pun begin to grate? For me, it was after about 12 milliseconds, but many of you appear to have greater tolerance. And can drink more.

Partey himself is full of smiles, but when asked about his new Gunners kit, he said he would simply have the name “Thomas” across the back.

• IT’S not only the omnipresent Wenger who has a new book out.

If you feel you have already heard all of the anecdotes that the former manager has to give – the one about van Persie begging to come back to Arsenal is a scream – then choose something a little more racy and select Nicklas Bendtner’s memoir.

You laugh, but it looks like there’s another lockdown coming up and people are going to need something to read.

Bendtner is not quite London Palladium material though, so you can’t blame him for diving straight into the quick-selling subject of sex and the apparent widespread hiring of sex workers.

“It’s less risky than picking up girls while out on the town,” the ever-classy forward explains.

“And if you’re prone to infidelity – I read somewhere or other this applies to 46 per cent of Danes – you hardly dare do the deed with a ‘civilian’ any longer. Not when you’re a famous footballer.

“I know about loads of incidents involving prostitutes. But I know of just as many stories about extortion via social media.”

Who knows what he’s talking about, maybe something has been lost in translation but I think it was Alan Partridge who last described it as “doing the deed”.

I think I’d rather have Wenger still insisting he almost signed Ronaldo, Messi and Ibrahimovic.

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